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IELTS Academic/General writing assessment

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Academic writing test

Task 2

Question:

Some people hold that we should spend amount of time and money on the protection of wild animals. Some people argue that they should be spent on human populations. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Answer:

257 words

although many believe human beings are the only creature that deserves caring, I would agree with those who hold an opposite opinion that the neglection of other species is not tolerable as it can cause severe consequences to the whole world, and measures, which will cost either time or money, must be taken to prevent irreversible damages from taking place. Despite the fact that human beings are ruling the world nowadays, no creature on the earth can live by its own without interacting with other species. With that said, the distinction of wild animals can affect the existence of human eventually through breaking the balance of global ecosystem. For example, around 20 years ago, Chinese Menggu wolves were died out due to exhaustive hunting, and the population of local sheep surged in the following year and ate out nearly every single grass in the paste. Five years later, the whole prairie disappeared and left a large area of desert which kept on creating problem to hundreds of surrounding cities. Therefore, protecting wild animals actually assures the healthy coexistences of thousands of species in the world, including human beings. Hundreds of species are surffering overhunting world-wide and dies out each year, thus urging us to take powerful means to protect them right away. Broadcasting the importance of ecological balance is needed, and compensative aids to local hunters, who live on hunting wild animals, are also necessary. Hence it is inevitable to invest a considerable amount of both human and financial resources to ensure the implementation of effective measures.

Overall band:

6.5

Evaluation:

The essay appropriately addresses the task by presenting a clear and developed position on the importance of protecting wild animals. Main ideas are extended and supported with examples, such as the case of the Chinese Menggu wolves. However, there is a tendency to over-generalize, and some supporting ideas could be more precise.

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